What do couples do together
By now, you know a good sweat session is great for the bod and brain — research shows it can improve your mood, memory, and sleep, not to mention speed up your metabolism , lower your LDL bad cholesterol, and, of course, promote healthy weight management. But working out with your partner has its own set of advantages. So go on, get yourself — and your partner — a new pair of sneakers already. Relationship experts across the board say finances are one of the leading causes of divorce , so if there's one thing all healthy couples do, it's talk about about money.
Rather than having one of you handle all the finances, Gretchen Kubacky , a health psychologist in Los Angeles, suggests paying bills together regularly.
That way, there are "no secrets, no surprises, and you can even make a game out of it to see if you can figure out a way to make your money work effectively," she says. Sure, paying the bills isn't exactly anyone's idea of fun , but Kubacky says "it relieves an undercurrent of stress and strengthens a couple's ability to work together on common goals.
Here's a fun fact: The average American spends upward of 10 hours a day on their phones, according to a recent Nielsen Company report. Between work email, personal errands, and staying tuned in to all things social media, that shouldn't really be surprising. But being glued to your cell phone doesn't promote healthy interactions with your partner, says Gathing. When both of you set the screen to black, it promotes bonding because it allows an opportunity for completely focused attention, or what Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages , deems quality time — one of the five ways people prefer to communicate with a loved one.
Gathing suggests setting limits on phone time — say, no phone allowed during dinner, or after 10 p. When you've been coupled up for a long time, it's easy to get stuck in the same routine — even what you do for fun can become monotonous. That's why Sari Cooper , certified sex therapist and director of the Center for Love and Sex , says it's important that couples take time to go somewhere they've never been before, like an outdoor sculpture gallery, historical home, or hall of fame.
It allows you to connect in the way that you did when you first started dating, when you were still discovering new things about one another and were eager to hear each other's opinions on new subjects. Regardless of who's the chef of the family, she says it's smart to set aside a time to prepare a full meal together.
Plus, men tend to talk more when they're doing something side by side, like chopping vegetables, rather than staring directly at you. So think of it as another way to catch up on what's going on in each other's day-to-day.
Yes, it's important that your partner accepts you for who you are and doesn't try to change you 'cause that'll open a whole can of worms that isn't fun for anyone. But Seda Gragossian, a licensed psychologist at Talk Therapy Psychology Center , says it's equally important that couples be able to provide each other with constructive criticism when necessary.
The most important part: Not being afraid to actually say it. What's not okay? Criticizing each other for things you cannot change, like whether he's more extroverted or how much alone time you need. Instead of boring yourself to tears trying to take up your partner's devout love of golf even though you know you already hate it, try doing something that's completely new to the both of you on your next date.
That's because novelty habits releases dopamine, a neurotransmitter that controls the brain's reward and pleasure centers. Whether you read chapters aloud to each other or simply take turns silently reading the same book, Gathing says that couples who read together report more relaxation and lower levels of stress. Hey, it's way easier to get book club together when it's just you and your hubs. Plus, "reading stimulates meaningful conversations and creativity, promoting a healthier connection," adds Gathing.
Try going to the bookstore or library together to pick out something you'll both enjoy one of these might do the trick , or, if you're generally interested in totally different genres, alternate between who gets to pick what you'll read that month.
If you're in need of new material, look up the nearest comedy club for date night. Make it fun by sending steamy text messages throughout the day that build in anticipation of the main event. While it can certainly be fun to play naughty nurse in the bedroom, Cooper says taking on a new personality outside of your sex life is also good for couples.
When something goes awry, your instinct may be to ask your partner "Why did you do that? Plus, you'll get more information by asking questions that begin with who, what, when, or where, as they're more about gathering information and details rather than passing judgment. It's a great idea for those who tend to get into small bickering routines, she says, as you can set a few rules like agreeing not to speak and only listening to music that make your time together more therapeutic.
Everyone has sexual fantasies , but more often than not Cooper says she hears couples complain about the predictability and monotony of their sex life after the first two years. That's why she suggests letting the occasional date night get a bit more erotic. Besides, no one will be paying attention to your moves but you.
Giving back to your community together is a really romantic thing to do, and it will make both of you feel good about yourselves. You can get an inexpensive homemade ice cream maker and play around with some creative flavors that you make up together. Of course, you will only be able to do this if the weather permits, but it makes for a very romantic memory.
No one really cares how badly you sing. Just get out of your shell and have a great time singing your favorite songs. A few drinks beforehand always helps! Or, at least take a lesson. Then you can plan the romantic trip to the country that you hope to visit one day and maybe speak the language enough that the locals will understand you. Sit somewhere outside where a lot of people tend to walk by and come up with crazy backstories for people as they pass you by.
This is the ultimate treasure hunt! You never know what you are going to find and it is a fun to do with your partner so you can share the thrill. If you are in a rut for date ideas , there are a lot of things you can do to shake things up a bit and bond with your partner.
She knows you love her, but she still appreciates everything you do to remind her of that. By now, you probably have some idea of what romantic gestures are most meaningful to her, so think of those as you look through the following ideas. And present it with an extra little surprise. This could be artisan-made from an organization that helps refugees, battered women, etc. Or you could add a gift card to the store, so she can pick one out herself.
Find local shops that sell ethically-made candles and ethically-harvested crystals. Take a look at the options and consider what she generally likes. Pinterest lets you create different boards for each category you might want ideas for, like paint colors, flooring, window coverings, etc. You can work on the same board together or or each create a related board and share your ideas with each other.
Find a sun-loving plant — like a Meyer Lemon dwarf — for that roomy, south-facing windowsill. Or pick out a shade-loving plant that cascades gracefully from its pot for that empty corner. You could also each pick out a plant for your own workspaces at home. After enjoying your ride, stop at your favorite street vendor or bistro for lunch. Pick a day when a local skating rink is open but not too busy and enjoy skating together. At some point, you can stop for some refreshment and talking before you hit the skating floor again when they play a song you like.
Any day is a good day to remind her how sweet you are on her. Plan a surprise weekend getaway for you both making sure she has nothing else planned and enjoy a couple of days just hanging out together and having fun. You can make a detailed itinerary or just a list of fun ways to spend the time. Make sure to see which items have been added most recently, since interests can change over time. Resolve not to end a message in anger. Be kind as well as honest and open. Finish with a loving and hopeful tone that stays with you when you put down your pen.
Find a way to make it romantic — maybe by lighting a few candles and brewing a couple mugs of her favorite tea or cocoa. Keep that in mind as you look through the following options for romantic gestures.
Order a piece of assembly-required furniture and put it together for him as a surprise. Or buy one from a thrift store or estate sale and wipe it down with some lemon oil to make it look new again. Enjoy it with him while you talk. You can even break out the fancy dinnerware to make the meal more special. Let him know any meal with him is worth that. It could be an heirloom piece or something he made himself. Clean it up and make it shine like new again.
It could be a collage of pictures taken during proud moments. Make it meaningful and visible to you both. You can also leave room for new additions as you collect or create them. Just as you might enjoy some girl time with close female friends and family members, he probably enjoys hanging out with his guy friends, brothers, or other close relatives. You can be navigator. Get to know one of his favorite hobbies and try your hand at it.
Compliment him on his cooking in front of your kids, his friends, extended family, or whoever else is there to hear it. Greet him with a hug and a kiss when he walks in the door to let him know how glad you are to see him and to set the tone for the evening. Let him know how his return brightens the day for you and makes you feel more at home. When he has to leave, do your best to give him a proper goodbye with a hug and a kiss or at least a warm smile.
Nothing perks up the senses and the mood like a scent you both love. You can vary it from week to week, using candles, incense, or an essential oil diffuser. Be sure to use safe, all-natural scent products to keep the air at home safe and wholesome to breathe. The only caveat is he might not want to ever let you go.
Pick up snack-size portions of treats he enjoys and sneak them into his lunch cooler or briefcase. So, if his pillow is looking sad, find a replacement that will give him the comfort and support he needs. You could also gift him a subscription to the Calm app for nighttime meditation. Few things put a damper on the final safe arrival at home, like not getting the car through the snow and ice and into the garage.
Try Vistaprint and take advantage of any offered discounts. You can order all the supplies for this online posterboard, markers, stickers, catalogs, magazines, etc.
You can also create a virtual vision board using an app. When you remove items that no longer serve you, you feel lighter afterward. You can breathe more easily. Home becomes a haven for you both. Decide on what needs your attention first or what you can tackle with minimal trauma. Bring on the slippers, robes, and self-care goodies. Light your favorite candles and round up all your skin-care and hair-care products for an all-out, full-body spa experience.
Put the kettle on to keep the tea in good supply, and talk as little or as much as you want. Cut out pictures of furniture, etc. Scrapbooks are easier to store, but vision boards are more visible. Take your pick or make one of each. Whip up some batches in different scents for gifts, and save a few of your favorites for date nights or quiet evenings together. Make it meaningful as well as fun,. Explore a new world of cuisine — whether you start with Indian, Korean, Greek, or any ethnic food that interests you both, possibly because of a family connection.
Start with some easy-to-make basics and branch out from there. You can find plenty of free videos on YouTube, and some phone apps like FitOn will let you watch workout videos on your desktop so you can both follow the instructor more easily.
Set aside a block of time and make sure you have beverages handy reading is thirsty work. Spread out a blanket or a tarp and then a blanket and lie down side by side under the stars or under the tops of trees swaying in the wind.
Spend the time quietly breathing together or take advantage of the chance to talk while holding hands. Use what resources are available to you and fill in some gaps. Each of you gets the chance to dress up and pose while the other has the camera and takes the shots. You can have multiple takes with different outfits or stick with one look for each of you. Pick out your favorites for each to make a keepsake ornament or mug.
No microwaves allowed. Supplies include a teakettle, a teapot, and teacups your choice of style , as well as loose-leaf tea or tea bags. If you both love it, this could become a regular morning or evening thing. If the sight of fresh, new puzzle pieces fills you both with joy, and you can hardly wait to get started on it, this is an excellent way to pass quiet afternoons or evenings together.
Each of you should have the chance to pick out puzzles you feel drawn to. Dress up as if you were going to see it in a Broadway theater, and have some foods and beverages of choice ready before you start streaming it on Disney Plus. Use the intermission for an actual intermission stretch your legs, etc. If one or both of you are having a birthday during quarantine, you can still celebrate together. Order in or make your birthday dinner and the cake or other birthday dessert , or pick it up curb-side.
Arrange for games or other fun activities. If you are a couple who enjoys getting out and having fun adventures together, now you have a menu of ideas to choose from.
Try a few of these date ideas with the person you love. Make a commitment to do a few of these a month. You may get a chance to see your beloved in a new light and learn something new about each other. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam.
Learn how your comment data is processed. Pin 10K. Share Buffer 5. What Should I Do to be Romantic? Bring a picnic to the park. Watch the sunset. Rent a paddle boat. Take a dance class.
Find a fireplace. Tour your hometown. Go to a spa. Go to a fondue restaurant. Make a fort. Take a ride in a horse-drawn carriage. Take a pottery class.
Go to a local bed and breakfast. Go to a drive-in movie. Make dinner together from scratch. Walk through a botanical garden. Go for a hot air balloon ride. Go to a vineyard. Rent a plush hotel suite for the evening. Swim with the dolphins. Take a pole dancing class together. Watch fireworks. Practice yoga in the park. Go to a new coffee shop. Go on a ferry ride. Romantic Nights At Home Ideas Watch a romantic movie.
Write letters to each other. Watch old home movies. Paint a room. Plan your dream vacation. Make breakfast. Turn your power off. Make a scrapbook. Host a game night. Bake a cake. Take a bubble bath. Mercer suggests marking your calendar to celebrate your first date , the date you got engaged, and your wedding, but also celebrating little moments, like a promotion or the achievement of a personal goal.
Martha Stewart Weddings. Jenn Sinrich, Freelance Writer. By Jenn Sinrich October 07, Save Pin More. Credit: Erika Brown Photography.
View All. Comments 2 Add Comment. Martha Stewart Member. January 16, Happy couples also pray together in faith for without good solid faith in the Heavenly Father they may not survive difficult times.
Also couples who give each space allows them to appreciate each other more. October 7, Articles like these always say the same things.
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